Why Sex Toys are just the LUBRICANT to the Sexual Conversation

Why Sex Toys are just the LUBRICANT to the Sexual Conversation

We all know the Sex Toy Industry is a slam dunk when it comes to profitability. A toy is created, it sells, and BAM, it goes viral. But what about the people who buy it? What are they really wanting from it and do they actually GET what they think they want? 

The amount of  money spent on the sex toy industry in the past 10 years has climbed 400%. Add in technological apps to the sex toy industry and you get the ultimate billion dollar industry: Sex Tech. The perfect combination ensuring anyone who invests now could retire quite quickly and of course, get off! Currently, (2018), The Sex Tech Market has exploded to a $15 billion dollar industry and is expected to reach $30 billion by 2025. That’s a lot of money spent on the illusion that a toy itself can bring you sustained sexual fulfillment.

Sex toys, games, etc sell and feature their best methods toward reaching climax. It’s as if no matter who the people are that play with the sex toy, as long as it reaches its intended destination, the G-spot or an orgasm, nothing else matters. But this is simply not true or accurate.

Being an a Psychoanalyst and sexually curious person by nature, I ‘m super inclined to not let the purchase of toys themselves be just the imagined or temporary solution to the sex game. What I find most interesting about this statistic is that the amount of money that is spent on culminating the perfect pussy or the perfect collection of rainbow colored dildos is ultimately geared toward purchasing just a “thing”, an “object”.  We pay good money to receive this consciously or not believing it might “cure” something we feel is missing in our sexual selves or relationships. 

After having heard thousands of accounts from my own clients the answer to the question of gaining sexual fulfillment through the use of a toy is not in the product itself. People just don’t report a toy cures all.  I would say that 90% or more people who buy these toys use them a handful of times and might learn a little about their partners sexual desires but what is even more important is the education that is lacking around the use of these products.

People are spending money on toys and related products not just because they are fun or make them come but they are actually spending money on them because they want an *experience*. They think buying a sex toy will give them that experience they desire however the plain fact is that no matter how many toys you buy, you won’t get your intimate and sexual desires filled from just an object. We need to do more than just use it. We need to learn that the toy is just the lubricant that allows us to then connect physically, sexually and most of all intimately.